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Incompetent Software Hucksters

It's us, or 600 monkeys

About us
Founded in 1987 in Silicon Valley, Incompetent Software Hucksters has been the premier provider of truth in advertising to the software industry for over a decade.

Our skilled staff has sufficient experience with such a diversity of quirky computer hardware and software that they can diagnose and fix problems almost clairvoyantly, even over the phone, even in software that they've never actually used. Think of us as your psychic computer consulting friends. We have provided consulting services to leading computer hardware and software vendors, as well as assisting business graduate students at a Famous California University with their computer needs.

Incompetent Vision
Ignore all that William Gibson crap, and don't take advice from anyone with an obviously assumed name like "Faith Popcorn". If you want to know what the future holds, come to Incompetent Software Hucksters for advice.
Incompetent Services
If you've got the money, we've got the time. And if you have to ask, then you probably can't afford it.
Contact us
ActiveLogoTM
If your site isn't sticky enough, if those eyeballs wander, you need ActiveLogoTM. Scientifically designed and rigorously tested at Incompetent Labs, the research arm of Incompetent Software Hucksters, ActiveLogoTM grabs web surfers' attention without causing dangerous epileptic seizures. License it now!
InvisibleHand
Is your business suffering from too much destructive competition? Is frictionless commerce cutting into your margins? Are the new electronic markets a little too open? If so, you need InvisibleHand, Incompetent Software Hucksters B2B cooperative pricing service. You tell us your price and who your competitors are, and we'll handle the rest. Combining the latest in proprietary signalling protocols with good-old-fashioned "enforcement", we'll make sure that you get the right price for your product.
Yer-in-trouble
Coming soon! Visualize a GIF of your favorite dot-com Captain-Bligh, poised above a virtual vat of urine. Dare you click the lever? Why should Andres Serrano have all the fun, at public expense yet? Let capitalism piss you off, and prove that free enterprise can compete in the offensive art market. Invest in our e-masterpiece, and SEND MONEY NOW.
Tits-N-Assets
Combining the two hottest internet industries, Incompetent Software Hucksters is proud to announce their new topless online stock trading service.
Palm Pirate
The personal organizer that's also an industrial espionage tool. First 100 customers get a free eyepatch and parrot. Optional accessories include a wooden leg and hook.
eTulip
An exciting internet investment opportunity in floral genomic research. Why waste valuable computing power looking for prime numbers or extraterrestrial life? Turn your spare CPU cycles into stock options and get in on the ground floor.
Portalette
For the little company on the go, the growing company that just can't wait, or the newly networked company with urgent problems, Incompetent Software Hucksters is proud to present Portalette, our quick-and-easy portal solution.
Reporting bugs
Send us all your bugs, no matter whose software they're in. We like to make fun of the other guys.

New! Incompetent Software Hucksters is seeking investors to provide capital so that we can describe, as well imagine, our exciting product plans. We promise to lose less money than Amazon.

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